I used to be...

I used to be jealous of all the happy couples I saw when I was out with Sal. Not to say that we weren't happy and in love, but we weren't always as affectionate as others in public. My friends would tell me that we looked as if we were best friends, instead of boyfriend and girlfriend.

Now here we are 5 years later... Sal and I are still together, meanwhile all of these couples that I was jealous of at one point or another, have broken up.

I laugh now... Why had I even been jealous? It was as if they were trying to fool everyone, along with themselves that everything was fine and that they were some happy couple, when clearly, behind closed doors, they were not.

Sal and I don't have to be affectionate in public, at least not to show each other or anyone else how much we love each other, because if anyone took a glimpse at us, they'd notice the little, subtle looks when we glance at each other, the small smiles, and laughs. Because after 5 years, sometimes we can talk to each other without even uttering a word. It's magical, really.

Our relationship works for us. This is not to say that all couples can act like best friends above everything else, and it's not to say that some couples that display public affection aren't happy... because I'm sure some couples are.

It's to say that there is no reason to compare one relationship to the next... to think that one relationship is better or that one couple is happier than the next, because everyone's definition of happy and definition of a relationship varies.

If you were to ask those couples if they thought that Sal and I were going to still be together in 5 years, I'm sure most of them would have said no. Sal and I are both extremely stubborn and strong-minded individuals, and while we both love each other with everything we have, we also argue often because we may not agree about everything. Many have probably been there for an argument or two, but at the end of the day, those arguments didn't matter, they didn't mean anything. We were, and still are, best friends above all else, above being boyfriend and girlfriend, and I wouldn't trade that for anything in the world. I think that's what made this relationship last as long as it has. We're there for each other 24/7, we are open and honest about our feelings and have great communication, and we love each other unconditionally.

Don't be jealous. Don't compare. Just know that love is love and it doesn't have to be paraded around or shown off like a trophy, because if it's real, true love... people will just know. The love Sal and I share was never forced, it just happened.

Happy 5 Year Anniversary - I love you Salvatore Michael, forever and always. Thank you for making these last 5 years, this last half of a decade so incredible and memorable. I don't know what I would have done without you. I can't wait for these next 5 years to see what's in store for us.

12.17.07

4 Years Later...

December 17th marks 4 years since Sal asked me to be his girlfriend. I can still remember that day like it was yesterday... out there on the frozen over soccer/baseball field. I don't even remember it being that cold out, I just remember the butterflies in my stomach, I knew it was coming.

This year, we originally wanted to go into the city to see the tree that night, but it was a Saturday, the week before Christmas, and we couldn't even get anywhere near the city. We decided to stay in Hoboken. We drove up and down the main road and decided to just walk and search for a place to eat. We found this cute little Italian restaurant and decided to try it.

He got the meat lasagna special, and I got the chicken parmigiana. It was absolutely delicious and we'd definitely go back again. We took a ride up to our spot, which overlooks Weehawken and the city, across the Hudson. It was so beautiful... the night was clear, and although it was cold, we had each other and that's all that mattered... just kidding we walked around for a bit, but it was seriously way too cold to just be standing there looking at a view. It was pretty amazing though to see a few photographers taking this opportunity to get the best pictures of the city, and although I'm not a photographer, I'd say I got a pretty good picture.

 Afterwards we drove around looking at all the Christmas lights, though we didn't think there were as many as last year... it was still nice and relaxing, especially once we stopped and bought hot chocolate to enjoy during the ride. We tried to go to Target to pick up a Gingerbread house to make, but get this... they were sold out! I couldn't believe it, but I guess that's what I get for waiting till last minute to make one.

The whole time we were talking about how quickly these 4 years went by, and how quickly the next 4 years would go by as well. We even got to talking about getting engaged next year, and although we'd be 23.. we're definitely not ready for a wedding until after I get my Master's and get settled in my career, maybe a 2 year engagement. I just couldn't help getting nervous and excited when he started talking about it... imagine, me engaged ... nope I can't imagine it either, but we shall see.